Saturday, August 13, 2011

Two Plus Two

It’s funny how we see things sometimes. I’m beginning to think that I often see things as I want them to be and not how they really are. It seems to take a poke in the eye to get me to finally see things differently.

Recently, I learned things about someone that totally changed my idea of them. I thought this person was someone else all together. They projected on me what they wanted me to see about them. So many things were hidden.

I know we’ve probably all done this in a way before. When I was married to a man and realized who I was, it took me a while before I didn’t project to the world that I was part of this “perfect couple.” That’s how others saw me. Saw us. I didn’t do it for any malicious intent or personal gain though, other than doing it until I was ready to step out of my old self into my new world. And, the people who really needed to know, knew.

However, it amazes me to find out that people can cast an intricate web of lies and stories to lead you down a certain path that benefits them and only them. How do we not see this when we are in it? Maybe they’re the ones who should be writing the novels?

Sometimes it takes going back and scrutinizing facts and dates to get the real perspective. The obvious comparison of those facts and figures from another can help you solve the problem to the answers. The answers you subconsciously may not have wanted to know. But should have.

I know I’m na├»ve in that I trust people to be completely honest with me. And, why not? I consider myself to be an extraordinarily honest person and I expect the same of others in my life. Why can’t we be honest in our friendships and our relationships? There would probably be a whole lot less therapy needed in this world.

I don’t really want to go through life always suspect of possible deceit and dishonesty. I choose to see the good side. I now see that I may have to open my eyes a bit more and trust my intuition. If I get a pang that something isn’t right, I need to stop and think more closely as to what that pang may mean. But, I don’t want it to change my enthusiasm and my optimism for life and those around me.

Life is a learning experience and hindsight is 20/20. And, I will learn to see things differently. But to do that, I hope they don’t all take a poke in the eye.

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