Monday, October 24, 2011

Seven Years. Time to Change.

My mom used to say that every seven years we go through a major change in our lives. I’m really thinking that there is some truth to that. Though my age isn’t divisible by seven, I can go back 28 years and tell you about milestones on the sevens. The most important, though, is what I’m dealing with now (more so, since I can’t change the past).

I think over the past seven years I’ve been on some type of mental hiatus. I think the stress of coming out and finding myself had me living in a state of complacency in other areas of my life. I don’t think it’s all just me that does this, I bet that many of us get comfortable living our day to day lives accepting what just is. Making the best of our situations or somehow dealing with it and calling it life. We know it isn’t perfect, but it’s what we know. Does that make it good? Maybe not. So how many years do we live like this?

Some people question change. Or, the ability to change. I believe as people, we have to change. If we don’t, we end up just being judgmental of the world and those around us…stuck in the place or level of knowing that we think is right. If we don’t change, we can lose those in our lives that mean the most to us. Making change within ourselves is hard. We get used to being who we are. Yes, we have to like and accept ourselves, but if there is a side to us that isn’t positive, we need to work on it. Change it so it is positive.

Sometimes we don’t see these things in ourselves. Or, it may be there, fuzzily, in the back of our minds. Maybe we know it, but maybe a bit of fear is there and it keeps us where we are? Sometimes it takes a friend with balls (though in my case, that’s figurative to describe my friend) to point out some of these things to us. Then, it takes opening up our minds and finding honesty in our hearts to accept what we’ve just been told. And, maybe some tears.

I’m lucky enough to have a second friend with balls (again, the figurative kind) to back up what the first said (I needed to be sure I guess of what I’d heard). How can I not listen to two honest, kick-in-the-butt opinions? If I’ve learned something in my 44 years, it’s to listen to those around me because I’m too close to me to see outside. Especially outside of the happy little box I’m calling life.

I’ve made a list of what I need to do. To change my life and myself as a person. I’ve already taken some first steps to accomplishing what’s on my list by just accepting the idea that things need to be different. Accepting the idea that I need to be different. And, that's half the battle towards accomplishing my goal. When I set my mind on something, I do it. It may take time to get to the point where I can check off the whole to-do list. It’ll take a heck of a lot of self-discovery and hard work, too. But, if all goes well, the next seven years will be filled with good changes, accomplishments and life in a much bigger (and even happier) box.

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