In Search of Forever Love

The idea of a love that lasts forever is one for us hopeful romantics. A theme for songs. For poems. For novels. And, for Hollywood movies (at least the chick flick variety).

Can one love in our life last forever? One love who is there through it all? Through thick and thin? Through ups and downs? As the Disney-theory goes, one would have to say “yes” to those questions. But, from life as I’ve seen it (and from what I’ve seen with so many others), I would say, “not exactly.”

As a friend once suggested, and as my life experiences have played out, there may be several loves in one’s lifetime. Several mates and partners that, each time, we think we are in love with them. The level of love may be different with each of those too. From first loves to lustful loves to this seems like I should make it work love. Maybe for each of those time periods in our life, those different loves worked?

Were we really sure that we were in love in each of those relationships? While we are in them we may think so. There’s the excitement. The butterflies. The passion. But is everything else there that should accompany those feelings? The sharing? The day to day rituals? The leaning on and being there for one another unconditionally? The dreaming of and working towards a future together? All of these things, along with the excitement, butterflies and passion should definitely be there.

Hindsight is 20/20. Looking back usually tells a different story. Initially we think we have those things. But careful or sometimes just obvious thought reveals that we didn’t have true love. It may have been young. It may have been forced. Or, it may have just been about sex and lust. Yea, good sex and lust can certainly feel like love.

Perhaps these different loves we thought we had are really just stepping stones for us? Steps that give us the background and knowledge for what we really want? Or, steps that give us the knowledge of what we don’t want? Steps that have given us experiences to compare what we’ve had to what we really need. Steps that show us how we treat others and how we should be treated.

I’d like to think that, now, as I am in my mid-40s that I have finally found my Forever Love. Funny thing is that I wasn’t even looking for it when it happened. I have been blown away by how right everything is with Five Eleven. How I have fallen in love with her from the inside out. By not looking, by not forcing a relationship, by starting out with a genuine friendship, I found someone who has matched up with all that I have ever wanted. Someone who totally gets me for me. And, who treats me the way I feel I have always deserved to be treated. And she loves the way that I treat her. It’s comfortable. We fit. How lucky am I?

So, from here on out, I figure I still have forever. Forever to experience and live life. And, now, I can do all that with my Forever Love.

How about you? Have you found your Forever Love? When did you find it? What makes it so special for you? Did you ever think you had it, but found out otherwise? Please share your thoughts below. Thanks!

@Ybbeige

http://facebook.com/barbarabeige

The kinda story we hope has forever love.

Sex and Yogurt Abs

Sometimes things change suddenly. Sometimes things change so slowly that you may not have noticed. I had one of those, “Wow, that’s different” realizations this past weekend. I realized that I actually had abs. Almost like a six pack type of thing going on.

I was sorting through clothes in my drawers and closet. Switching out winter stuff and getting out more shorts and summer wear (though the temps are still questionably cold for Maine). There were lots of things to try on. Some that I vaguely remember being big from last summer and some things I was shrinking out of this past winter. Why put it away when I don’t ever plan on going back up in size?

So, standing in front of my mirrored closet doors (oh, the wonders of 70s architecture), I saw that I actually had definition. Woohoo. Rockin’ the abs!

The funny thing is that I haven’t been trying for them. I mean I do eat right. Lots of protein. Every morning I eat a bowl of plain Chobani Greek Yogurt with flaxseed meal, wheat germ and some type of fruit mixed into it. Usually half a banana. Switching to yogurt versus having cereal every morning has made a difference in weight loss/weight maintenance for me. And, it’s made a difference in what fits and what doesn’t; and obviously in what my abs are looking like.

I started with vanilla yogurt then went to plain and added my own honey.
Now, I skip the extra carbs and sugar and get my sweetness from the wheat germ and fruit.

Besides the yogurt, I do exercise. Well, the only “formal” exercise I do is one weekly yoga class (if I’m lucky). I try to do a few sit ups and pushups every other day or so. Plus, I try to walk on the beach a few times a week because I just love to be by the ocean. Exercise that doesn’t seem like exercise is my favorite kind.

One of the best exercises that fits into that category is sex. (Masturbation is a close second). Especially for an ab workout. You tighten every muscle and then relax it again. Your heart rate goes up. Way up sometimes. You burn 144 calories every thirty minutes having sex. It’s a good thing, as Martha would say.

Since 5-11 Sexy Boi has come into my life, I think that has made a world of difference for my abs and my body. I’m sure as heck smiling more. Smiling may not burn calories but kissing does. Making out burns 268 calories every half hour. My kind of workout.

Maybe the yogurt thing had started working for me, but having a sexy sexual girlfriend has just pushed my body to a new level. (Now, here’s where most people cringe at the thought of their parents reading their blog and putting out there, “Hey, Mom and Dad… I’m having sex and lots of it. Oh well, the fun of being me. Winky face.)

So, grab some yogurt. Grab a mate and have sex. Lots of sex. Before you know it, you’ll be rockin’ the abs.

@Ybbeige

http://facebook.com/barbarabeige

www.barbarabeige.com
Unexpectations for Kindle

Coming Together

Today is one of those days where I feel like everything is coming together for me. In my personal life and with my book. I like days like this. Days where I feel like I’ve put so much positive energy and positive thought into what I want that I actually can manifest anything. On days like this, I can’t help but smile. And smile some more.

The book update is that the publisher is shipping me the complimentary copies (all five of them) of my first novel, Unexpectations. I should get them in the next week or two they said. I’m hoping sooner. Seems like that’s just pony express-type delivery. What about priority mail? I can’t wait to actually feel one in my hands. I know they aren’t hard-bound, but they are a real book. I’ve seen the style that’ll be in the interior. I’ve seen the front and back cover designs. I’m trying to imagine it as one cohesive unit. One cohesive book. My dream all put together.

When I receive them, if they look okay, I’ll immediately put in an order so I can send copies out to my friends who want them autographed. Seems funny to me that people want my autograph, but I’ve always thought it was cool to have a book signed by an author too.

Today, I was also able to proof and edit my press release. This is what will go out to hundreds of different media outlets to let them know about my book. I tweaked a few words in it. I wasn’t crazy about the publisher’s description of my book being “utterly heartbreaking and wildly exotic.” Hard to picture a New England setting as exotic. I changed that to “utterly heartbreaking and wildly captivating.” Unless they meant erotic as a friend suggested? Don’t worry…this novel isn’t in that genre though it does contain several sex scenes. (I’ll have to talk about how it was writing those sometime…more difficult than you’d think!).

Everything is just feeling good for me. I wish that on everyone else I know too. I’m all about positive thinking. Don’t look at what is wrong in your life. Look at what is right. I’m certain everything will be shifting to all good if we can keep thinking that way. And, all of our lives will have that coming-together feeling. It just feels right that way.